I think I am being far too unreasonable to myself. Being so ridiculously ridiculous and after being mad over something so absurd makes me want to smack myself hard in the head. But I just can't help it. I get myself too disappointed easily. But sometimes those silly things I assumed do make sense. I tend to get carried away easily and things seems to hurt me a lot. Though I look happy and fine in the outside just because I chose to hide and keep it deep down eating me up. When I need a listening ears, those that always come to me to listen never seems to be there. All I need to do is just do something about this and not just sit to watch it move away. It is sad how those that used to make you feel so special makes you feel like a dud now. Be it intentional or unintentional, I felt so demoralized. It's not my fault I grow up this way. If it was made optional, I would choose the option "perfect". That's right, it's impossible for nobody's perfect. I don't have much choice really. And I learn to love myself just because. I love the way I am though I wish I was better. But I always believed there's a blessing in disguise behind everything that happened on earth. I don't understand why the need of feeling envious. Everybody have got their own version of happiness and the things they do that makes them happy. So why not just live with it, mind your own business rather then having yourself stuck up your nose in someone else's ass? So I think for now I will just let the bimbo do whatever she wanna do and let her steal my happiness away although the whole feeling is so shitty. I just have to hold on now because I know this is just momentarily. I put in the least effort to gained it but bimbos just have to waste their time for trying too hard for it. Oh wells, no use banging my head for others. But hey, I should really do something than be a loser and sit and watch. There's a lot more I would like to say. A lot more should be revealed from what's deep within. But I guess, some words are better left unsaid.
Orangedoll
is thankful for the clothes that fits a lil too snug;
it means she haf enuff to eat .
